Lifelong Learning
A commitment to lifelong learning is deeply ingrained in the military culture. Flight commanders are among the most voracious readers I've met in any field. Pilots and instructors become subject-matter experts in particular specialties, but they all share one quality above all others: leadership. And leaders are readers.

Debriefs and Feedback Loops
Debriefs are the hallmark of a successful mission. A debrief occurs after a training mission (or a real one) and often lasts longer than the actual flight. In most cases, the lead pilots are responsible for conducting the debrief, and they begin by identifying their own mistakes. Even if the mission went smoothly, there's always room for improvement. By acknowledging their own mistakes, leaders give tacit permission to the rest of the team to identify those areas where they could have performed better. Above all, encourage yourself and others to recognize their mistakes and express a commitment to fixing them next time. It's inspiring to see a team of people committed to constant and never-ending improvement and who are all aligned toward achieving their fullest potential.

Mission Clarity
Clarity is at the heart of a mission brief. Clarity is achieved through the acronym BLUF (bottom line up front). BLUF is a concise recap of the essential message, and it's always "up front," or at the beginning of a discussion. Every person on the flight team must be crystal clear on the objective. For example, if the goal is to destroy a target, then if someone gets separated, the rest of the team knows to advance to the target. Although the pilots are highly specialized and understand their roles, they have to be reminded of the target--the big picture.

Presentation Practice
Although the best flight instructors are chosen in part for their presentation skills, they're constantly sharpening their ability to communicate complex ideas. In a book called Topgun's Top 10 Leadership Lessons From the Cockpit, Commander Guy M. Snodgrass (U.S. Navy, Retired), a Topgun instructor, recalls the intense training he received to be an exceptional presenter. His assignment was to deliver a four-hour presentation from memory--no notes or reading from slides. At first, it seemed like an impossible task, but practice lectures made it possible.

Becoming an exceptional communicator and inspiring leader is worthwhile but never easy. It takes passion, dedication, and an unrelenting commitment to excellence.

Speak! Act! Impact!

At their best, relationships—both romantic and platonic—can be one of the strongest sources of happiness and stress relief. They can offer positive experiences, keeping our moods high and steady, and creating a source of support when times are tough.

At their worst, however, relationships can feel toxic and can be a significant source of stress. This stress can be the constant, low-grade type, the intermittent stress that creates some measure of anxiety even when things are going well, or a variety of other forms of stress.

Much of what can make a relationship stressful or stress relieving is the type of communication that holds the relationship together. Healthy communication can enable us to weather nearly any storm and can keep things running smoothly on a day-to-day basis.

If communication is open and clear, small problems are dealt with quickly and easily, and the relationship moves on. When communication is less healthy, small problems can become larger problems and resentment can grow.

Here are some unhealthy types of communication to avoid, and how they create stress. You’ll also find healthier ways to communicate in all of your relationships. 

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